My Rant!!! Postman Pat Ran Over His Cat!
Thinking about it, he's a bit of a legend really.. if you are not familiar with him do a google search>image, his cat Jess is pretty well known and in the UK, we made tunes in the playground about the postie running him over (I'm not sure if kids still do that or they're too busy shooting each other and what ever else the little rascals get up to these days)
Anyway basically the lyrics to theme tune are as here>
http://lyricsplayground.com/alpha/songs/p/postmanpat.shtml
We sang: postman pat, postman pat,postman pat ran over his cat,all the guts went flying,postman pat was crying,never seen a cat as flat as that,splat!
or
Postman Pat, Postman Pat, Postman Pat ran over his cat, all the guts went flying, all the children were crying, now pat's a very happy man.
and a few years later....
Postman Pat, Postman Pat,Postman Pat was done for screwing his cat, Pat was feeling randy,Jess was sitting handy, So Pat just had his pussy there and now Pat's a very happy man!
Basically my point is.. changing the lyrics of popular songs was fun and I'm sure possibly helped you in an educational way (though I'm not 100% sure of that) and now the little kids in England just go around shooting up heroin and killing each other, and they're not even "hard", they whinge about everything. Give me a Thai kid any day, when I was over there - they were well behaved, happy and playing as kids (the ones that weren't part of the sex trade that is), Polish children are quite reasonable - though there's not a lot of kids around in Warsaw - I don't think the pope's message about condoms is working and as for Meditarranean children - Italians, Greeks, Egyptians, Portuguese (well it's Atlantic officially but same mentality).. forget them, they are spoilt little metrosexuals walking around with mobile phones from the age of 4? 4? 4?! The cunts can barely speak? What are they doing, organising drug deals of baby food or something! Go and play football with a tin can, a ball of wool or an empty bottle (not glass, you'll kill your mate when he heads it)
BAH, you watch how messed up people are going to become in this century! Geronimo knew what he was talking about.
Sorry for the swearing, hope it doesn't offend any girls reading or any of the 4 year olds who are reading it when they're not on their bloody telephones.
I've not done a lot this weekend, mainly been having a few beers, working and listening to music. Found out one of my old mates from Portugal has died of diabetes, that's a shame... he owned a bar which did a stunning beans on toast (I know it's hard to go wrong with beans on toast.. but they had a belarussian waitress once and she had no idea what was going on, I think she was trying to make them look like kidney beans or something)
For the non-british readers - Beans on toast look like this... http://www.fotosearch.com/comp/ITS/ITS185/ITF085009.jpg
They're beans with a sweet tomato sauce on, a delicacy in the UK - said to make little boys grow strong. Goes down well with some Daddies Brown Sauce:
http://www.plugger.info/elite/Product_images/daddiesbrownsauce4.jpg
When you eat some beans with daddies, as a young boy - it makes you feel two years older ;), it's to be blamed for missing panties from washing lines, I'm sure of it.
I've decided.. there's no way I will ever stop travelling, true I've been a bit stationary recently but even after you've been to every single country in the world.. there's parts of those countries you haven't visited. There's islands and islands and islands! The only way, a true traveller could stop.. would surely be by death!
Hey, I look forward to the day.. I'll be able to visit a safe Baghdad, it will mean the USA, UK and and all the other hangers on.. i.e. Bulgaria, Lithuania, Poland..pulled out. (They are just as bad, arse licking Bush for a bit of money rather than doing the good thing and pulling out (or better still not joiing in the first place).. Co-Allition forces, Co-Allition bollox. It's corrupt rubbish and now here in Warsaw we have police walking around and people thinking the place is going to get bombed, there is no need for that threat to be created, just for a few dollars)
Not only that but the people of Iraq would have to have calmed down a lot, I don't see it happening though, it seems to be escalating into a bit of a Somali scene. What happened there... peace keepers involved, they escalate the war, kill thousands of people, bomb the shit out of Mogadishu, make people hungrier and poorer and now it's in absolute state and shows very little sign of recovery.. The Somalian flag is great to look at by the way - not sure what it symbolises.
Check out the The Tuamotus (they're a group of islands that cover the span of Western Europe in the Pacific Ocean..), The Paracels (disputed islands by Vietnam and China), The Aleutians (that's the pointy finger of islands spanning from Alaska over towards Russia) and of course in the UK, the island with cult status "Rockall".. (check out www.therockalltimes.com ) to mention islands in the middle of nowhere off the coast of Africa such as St. Helena, Tristan da Cunha and Ascension Island where some bloody bizarre expats must live. Hey, I've even got to go to The Falklands.. I hear they do a good fish and chips there.
While I'm chunnering, I'm getting a bit bored of hearing about people going on and on about British Comedy being funny, that stuff like Fawlty Towers and Monty Python, granted it's good stuff.. some of the best and I'm glad you like it.. but download or ask me for some more up to date stuff, if you think we didn't laugh since the 1970's, you probablywear trousers like John Cleese!
Ok so here's a list of stuff you should look out for.. old and new, download or ask me for some copies
Little Britain
The League of Gentleman
The Office (Most people like it, I'm personally not a fan.. make sure you don't get the American version)
Bottom
Billy Connolly Live
Alan Partridge (He looks like djdirect only better looking)
The Young Ones
Only Fools and Horses
Dinnerladies
Goodness Gracious Me
The Fast Show
Blackadder
Father Ted (it's Irish but we seem to steal it, not sure why?)
Dave Spikey Live, Peter Kay Live, Max & Paddy's Road to Nowhere, Phoenix Nights, That Peter Kay Thing (you'll have to brush up on northern slang and be quick though to understand what's going on)
Well that will be enough to keep you going, let me know what you think and come back for more.
P.S. You can't beat a bit of Dangerman either!!
Anyway basically the lyrics to theme tune are as here>
http://lyricsplayground.com/alpha/songs/p/postmanpat.shtml
We sang: postman pat, postman pat,postman pat ran over his cat,all the guts went flying,postman pat was crying,never seen a cat as flat as that,splat!
or
Postman Pat, Postman Pat, Postman Pat ran over his cat, all the guts went flying, all the children were crying, now pat's a very happy man.
and a few years later....
Postman Pat, Postman Pat,Postman Pat was done for screwing his cat, Pat was feeling randy,Jess was sitting handy, So Pat just had his pussy there and now Pat's a very happy man!
Basically my point is.. changing the lyrics of popular songs was fun and I'm sure possibly helped you in an educational way (though I'm not 100% sure of that) and now the little kids in England just go around shooting up heroin and killing each other, and they're not even "hard", they whinge about everything. Give me a Thai kid any day, when I was over there - they were well behaved, happy and playing as kids (the ones that weren't part of the sex trade that is), Polish children are quite reasonable - though there's not a lot of kids around in Warsaw - I don't think the pope's message about condoms is working and as for Meditarranean children - Italians, Greeks, Egyptians, Portuguese (well it's Atlantic officially but same mentality).. forget them, they are spoilt little metrosexuals walking around with mobile phones from the age of 4? 4? 4?! The cunts can barely speak? What are they doing, organising drug deals of baby food or something! Go and play football with a tin can, a ball of wool or an empty bottle (not glass, you'll kill your mate when he heads it)
BAH, you watch how messed up people are going to become in this century! Geronimo knew what he was talking about.
Sorry for the swearing, hope it doesn't offend any girls reading or any of the 4 year olds who are reading it when they're not on their bloody telephones.
I've not done a lot this weekend, mainly been having a few beers, working and listening to music. Found out one of my old mates from Portugal has died of diabetes, that's a shame... he owned a bar which did a stunning beans on toast (I know it's hard to go wrong with beans on toast.. but they had a belarussian waitress once and she had no idea what was going on, I think she was trying to make them look like kidney beans or something)
For the non-british readers - Beans on toast look like this... http://www.fotosearch.com/comp/ITS/ITS185/ITF085009.jpg
They're beans with a sweet tomato sauce on, a delicacy in the UK - said to make little boys grow strong. Goes down well with some Daddies Brown Sauce:
http://www.plugger.info/elite/Product_images/daddiesbrownsauce4.jpg
When you eat some beans with daddies, as a young boy - it makes you feel two years older ;), it's to be blamed for missing panties from washing lines, I'm sure of it.
I've decided.. there's no way I will ever stop travelling, true I've been a bit stationary recently but even after you've been to every single country in the world.. there's parts of those countries you haven't visited. There's islands and islands and islands! The only way, a true traveller could stop.. would surely be by death!
Hey, I look forward to the day.. I'll be able to visit a safe Baghdad, it will mean the USA, UK and and all the other hangers on.. i.e. Bulgaria, Lithuania, Poland..pulled out. (They are just as bad, arse licking Bush for a bit of money rather than doing the good thing and pulling out (or better still not joiing in the first place).. Co-Allition forces, Co-Allition bollox. It's corrupt rubbish and now here in Warsaw we have police walking around and people thinking the place is going to get bombed, there is no need for that threat to be created, just for a few dollars)
Not only that but the people of Iraq would have to have calmed down a lot, I don't see it happening though, it seems to be escalating into a bit of a Somali scene. What happened there... peace keepers involved, they escalate the war, kill thousands of people, bomb the shit out of Mogadishu, make people hungrier and poorer and now it's in absolute state and shows very little sign of recovery.. The Somalian flag is great to look at by the way - not sure what it symbolises.
Check out the The Tuamotus (they're a group of islands that cover the span of Western Europe in the Pacific Ocean..), The Paracels (disputed islands by Vietnam and China), The Aleutians (that's the pointy finger of islands spanning from Alaska over towards Russia) and of course in the UK, the island with cult status "Rockall".. (check out www.therockalltimes.com ) to mention islands in the middle of nowhere off the coast of Africa such as St. Helena, Tristan da Cunha and Ascension Island where some bloody bizarre expats must live. Hey, I've even got to go to The Falklands.. I hear they do a good fish and chips there.
While I'm chunnering, I'm getting a bit bored of hearing about people going on and on about British Comedy being funny, that stuff like Fawlty Towers and Monty Python, granted it's good stuff.. some of the best and I'm glad you like it.. but download or ask me for some more up to date stuff, if you think we didn't laugh since the 1970's, you probablywear trousers like John Cleese!
Ok so here's a list of stuff you should look out for.. old and new, download or ask me for some copies
Little Britain
The League of Gentleman
The Office (Most people like it, I'm personally not a fan.. make sure you don't get the American version)
Bottom
Billy Connolly Live
Alan Partridge (He looks like djdirect only better looking)
The Young Ones
Only Fools and Horses
Dinnerladies
Goodness Gracious Me
The Fast Show
Blackadder
Father Ted (it's Irish but we seem to steal it, not sure why?)
Dave Spikey Live, Peter Kay Live, Max & Paddy's Road to Nowhere, Phoenix Nights, That Peter Kay Thing (you'll have to brush up on northern slang and be quick though to understand what's going on)
Well that will be enough to keep you going, let me know what you think and come back for more.
P.S. You can't beat a bit of Dangerman either!!
posted by dangaroo at 2:31 PM
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